Seasons Change

Spring is finally here and so many things are changing… The weather… The temperature… The trees and flowers… Our clothing… Our attitudes… Even our schedules…

I’ve been taking this course with Janet Marquez and I must admit it’s made me super sentimental. It’s opening up all of my blocks and helping me heal… I’ve been working on the physical stuff, but she really opened up some stuff for me… Emotionally and Spiritually.

My dad died in March and my mom died in April so these are some really heavy months for me… I know it’s not good to hold on to the past… If you hold on to anything for too long, regardless of how light it is, it gets heavy and you begin to hurt and ache… But it’s good to check in every once in a while, even if it’s just to see how much you’ve grown and flourished.

I was looking at photos of my cousin Leslie’s wedding in Michigan from a few years back.  Actually, it was 5 years ago this past February… (Happy Belated Anniversary Leslie!!!) I almost could not believe how much has changed since those photos were taken!

For starters, Speedy was soooo young!!! He was 2 and a half years old and just scrumptious! He kept calling Leslie’s new husband Juan, the number “One” and sticking up his pointer finger every time he said it! He’s still too cute, just a whole lot bigger!!!

Then there are the photos where I see myself… Wow. I was a completely different person.  They say on a cellular level, your cells regenerate and you are a completely new person every 7 years, but I think I sped up the process!

Everything was just sooo different!

For starters I was huge! I was quickly getting big, probably around 200 lbs.  I had just come out of the hospital the month before for the second time because of my neurosarcoidosis.  The 10 day’s worth of intravenous Prednisone at 1,000 mg per day definitely did absolutely nothing for my girlish figure! I went in around 150 and left weighing over 180 pounds in just 10 days from the intense meds. I was full on chipmunk cheeks, buffalo hump and swollen everything in that short time.  Staying at 60 mg of prednisone daily made everything impossible at the time… Even losing weight.

Second… I thought I was happily married.  I had even planned a surprise birthday party for my husband earlier that month with all of our family and friends… Only to find out much later during our divorce that he was already cheating. Although it makes me sad things had to play out the way they did, now I am actually grateful for my independence.

Thirdly… I didn’t really realize the power of nutrition yet.  This one was one of those “duh” things that later on you slap yourself on the forehead and ask “why didn’t I connect this before? Duh!” My ex-husband has really bad ulcerative colits. He’s had it since his early 20’s and it has only gotten worse over the years.  His “Best Doctors in New York City” gastroenterologist actually told him he could eat whatever he wanted because food didn’t matter with his condition.

Well I proved that doctor wrong rather quickly! Give him some cow’s milk, peanuts, shrimp or hot sauce and see how quickly he bleeds! I actually helped him get off of meds – 9 pills a day, yes NINE – off, completely with no flare ups for a whole summer and then some! Eventually he went back to drinking soda and eating fast food and that was the end of pill free living. But all of that being said… It still took me a while to consider the power of food for my own healing. Even for my son, back then I was still letting gluten and dairy products slide on special occasions…

Fourth… I used to use essential oils on my light-bulbs and on the hot radiator to make the room smell good.  I bought them at random places whenever I wanted a new scent or ran out of the ones I currently had.  Back then, I never knew the power a pure, therapeutic grade essential oil could actually have.

Fifth… During that time, I considered my husband to be my best friend… He was very antisocial and never liked being out of his comfort zone. So once we got together, I let almost all of my friendships fade… We hardly went out to social events because he didn’t like crowds. But I always had work friends and I loved being with my husband… And then I became a full time mom.  I had my son to focus on… After my son’s diagnosis, the only other adult friends I had were all of the rotating therapists I had in and out of my home on a daily basis… The two ABA Therapists who were there for 20 hours a week… the Occupational Therapist… the Physical Therapist… the Speech Therapist… He even had a Sensory Integration Therapist who I would find myself confiding in.

My husband didn’t want anyone in his family to know my son had autism, so it was really hard keeping friends and family close when you’re always lying to them.  One day my mother-in-law was coming to visit and arrived early. We panicked because my son’s OT was still there… I actually had to ask Gina to please lie and say she was checking to see how well my son was adjusting to his orthotic braces if my mother-in-law asked.  I was living autism 24 hours a day… Everything was about my son and figuring how to help him excel. Then pile on managing my own illness without any help… It was tough.

“If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.”
– Anne Bradstreet

Fast forward 5 years…

I’m a much healthier weight and I am completely off of pharmaceutical drugs!!! It’s been one year and 5 months since my last pill and not a single sign of a relapse!

I’m a single mom living alone… Just Speedy and me. No, not a bad thing at all!!! Although I miss his income and our old home, I don’t miss the lies, fights and the cheating. Oddly enough, I’m not bitter. I believe our purpose together was to have Speedy. Since he fulfilled his purpose, it was necessary for us to move on.

I found the power of eating healthy! I was first able to lose a ton of weight while still being on meds. I was also able to decrease all of my symptoms from both the neurosarcoidosis AND the negative side effects from the meds. Juicing, cutting out sugar, salt, oil, gluten and dairy helped me feel a whole hell of a lot better!!!

Speedy is doing a lot better! Once his dad left, I was able to totally clear the house of all of his food allergens! That made it a lot easier to focus on what will help both of us heal instead of cooking two separate meals every day! I even went back to school to become a Holistic Health Coach!!! Imagine that!

Essential Oils… Well they have been a game changer!!! Not only did they give my body the extra support it needed to help detox and finally get off and stay off meds… They changed my career path! Now I’m working on building my own business and know the sky is the limit on my income potential…

I have a whole new set of amazing friends… Some old that I reconnected with and some new. Some are squares like me and others are totally the opposite from me. Some are into essential oils, some are not… yet. It’s great to have an amazing support system that helps me work on being better in all areas of my life. I can be me. No lies, no false masks, no omissions.

Now I am free to share all of our joys and wins, as well as our trials and tribulations. By doing so, we can help others on their own journey towards health and wellness.

Sometimes we hold on to things, people and feelings for way too long because of our fear of the unknown. Even tho it may make us angry, sad, depressed or alone, it feels safe because it’s familiar. Regardless of how well you think you plan your life out, it never goes according to plan. That’s why you have to be flexible and have a positive mindset. Once we realize the only thing we can control is ourselves, we are able to let go of our fears by replacing it with hope and optimism. That’s when the magic happens!!!

Feel free to embrace change, face your fears, and remember that you have survived every other challenge thrown at you. You will survive the next one as well. You just might discover an amazing life is waiting for you…

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